Hello lovelies,

It’s Monday. I love the sun, but not the humidity we had today and tomorrow it is supposedly going to be worse. A school has no air conditioning and when cleaning and cupboard clear outs are on the cards you don’t want it so hot! I was sweltering and sweaty, not a pretty sight or smell. Sadly, I couldn’t spend the day sitting next to the small fan in the corner wafting my skirt around trying to aerate the sticky, damp regions. Instead I had to suffer.

Last night I was sadly woken twice from my slumber by a knocking at our upstairs bedroom window. It has been happening far too frequently for my liking Cat on the roofand I’m afraid I blame the men in my life. They might not be the perpetrator, but it is down to their carelessness. My son goes out in the garden for a cigarette and forgets to check who followed him out. My husband leaves his office window open welcoming night time escapees to break out. Sadly, the escapees don’t want to re enter the way they exited. The middle of the night knocker was a cat on a hot, not tin, roof. We have three cats but it was the male kitten now aged 8, who is the biggest, noisiest, most demanding black and white diva going!

End of term teacher gifts came into the classroom today.  I was given two big bunches of flowers from a grateful child and his parent, with a lovely card thanking me for helping him become the chatty and confident child he is now and telling me I would be missed. Everyone knows I like performing and my class have plenty of opportunities to sing, dance and act and develop confidence. It is lovely to know your work is appreciated and rewarding to see the progress and confidence in a child grow. One of the bunches was some beautiful red roses unusually covered in glitter, which the child apparently chose glitter rosesespecially for me. Suddenly, a lightbulb moment occurred. They say pets take after their owners, well what sort of a person would be given sparkly red roses? Yes, it came to me, a performing DIVA! My cat must take after ME!

It’s Tuesday or at school Shoesday. I have issues with shoes as my feet swell in the heat and no footwear fits orShoesday is comfortable. Shoesday for me, was a dull pair of unexciting but cool flip flops on my sweaty feet. However, for one member of our staff footwear is a passion, some might say an obsession. We are not talking about any old footwear here, we are talking about jazzy, sparkly individual shoes of a kind only worn by passionate shoe wearers! The only unusual aspect about the shoes is that they didn’t have stilettos or wedges, instead they were flat and MALE. Through the day he changed his shoes every hour to live up to his school reputation of shoe obsessive. The kids absolutely loved it.

Today I also did performing of a different kind. A long term member of staff was leaving and we put on a special assembly. The teacher had once taught hand chimes . Yes they do exist, in a suitcase in our school music room! It was decided that all staff should have a go at playing them in her assembly. We Hand chimeshave been rehearsing after school for the past three weeks and taken it very seriously. Chiming requires a lot of concentrating, which sometimes I found challenging, counting in your head, which I seemed to find tricky and counting to 4, which was thankfully fine for my limited mathematical ability. I was also hand chime number 4. (importantly, without a dash, as that is another note entirely!) This note choice helped in the pieces of music I had to play.  Each piece was vaguely recognisable which by beginners standards was outstanding, although whoever had 3′ failed to play and my hand shaking was so enthusiastic I hit the music stand with a great crash at a moment where a cymbal style noise was not appropriate. Whoops.

After school we went for afternoon tea at Highfield Park Hotel in Heckfield. The views were lovely, Highfield park, Heckfieldlemon and lime homemade drink refreshing, sandwiches plentiful, scones yummy, chocolate cakes were melting and the heat was too much! However we all had a fun time and I was introduced to Snapchat by one of the younger members of staff. I am renowned for being useless with technology so she set me up, did a fast track ‘this is what you do’ that I’m none the wiser about and showed me how to change my face which is apparently crucial! I have now been told I can make the best faces which with Honestly Fionaadded technology makes me look quite frankly hideous. Honestly Fiona with Snapchat turned me into Princess Fiona from Shrek, but of the yellow faced kind!

My Tuesday evening was spent ferrying eldest son up and down an abundance of motorways. First collecting him from Guildford, then taking him to a rehearsal for Assassins in Sunbury and then returning me back home down the M3 just in time for bed.

It’s Wednesday and half day at work. Leavers Assembly ended with me being awarded a certificate for being the LOUDEST Teacher. . .Really? Can I help it that my voice with all its drama training, projects so well down a corridor, over a playground and across a hall? Can I help it that when I laugh according to my husband I sound like one of the witches from Macbeth because my laugh is loud and sometimes high pitched? Can I help it that I was born into a large family where to be hear you had to speak loudly? Can I help it that I was born with a big mouth that with the aid of Snapchat looks obscene? No I can’t , well maybe I could if I wasn’t such a diva and didn’t care! Take me as I am, loud, a big mouth, likes to laugh and is occasionally yellow.

Honestly Fiona xx